21-10-2015, 09:55 | #1 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: peoples democratic republic of west yorkshire
Vehicle: " alice "
Posts: 10,473
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your midweek norty joke
A man is driving down the road when he sees a car off the side of the road, on it's top, and in flames.
No one else is around, so he gets out to see if he can help. Inside, he finds a beautiful woman and she is bleeding profusely. He rushes her to the hospital, where she spends the next six months. He stays by her side day and night caring for her, even donating blood to her as needed. When she is released, they continue seeing each other and get married soon after. Everything was great for a few years, then she realizes that he doesn't give a shit about anything but his money and she decides to leave him. She comes walking down the stairs, car keys and bulging suitcases in hand. He stops her, says "where are you going with those keys, I bought that car, it belongs to me." She tosses him the keys and keeps walking. "And those clothes and the suitcases, I've bought it all." She throws down the clothes and keeps walking. She get to the door when he says "Come to think of it, about half the blood in your body belongs to me, you're not going anywhere." She quickly reaches down and pulls out her tampon, throws it in his face and says, "Fine, I'll pay you back in monthly installments." |
21-10-2015, 10:51 | #2 |
Moderator
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: West Midlands
Vehicle: 04 2.7 SWB Terrano II Van
Posts: 13,526
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Jesus thats rough
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Moderator 04' Terrano II SE 2.7 TDi SWB Commercial in Silver - Project Thread Toyo Open Country M/T 33's on 10J Steels, Super Strong Steering Job Navara D22 Snorkel, Front LOKKA, Maunal Hubs, EGR Blank TunitII ECU Chip, 3" Body Lift, 2" Suss Lift, Heat Exchanger Black Interior, 3.0 Borg&Beck Clutch, Eckes Heated Fuel Filter 99' Y61 Patrol GR SE 2.8 TD6 LWB in Blue/Silver - Project Thread Engine Transplant - In Progress!!! |
21-10-2015, 11:20 | #3 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Oxfordshire
Vehicle: 3.0Di SVE '05 5 door.
Posts: 1,536
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Holy cow. Please let your holiday be short.
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21-10-2015, 11:31 | #4 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Staffordshire
Vehicle: Maverick Mk I 2.7 TD LWB
Posts: 7,825
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Boy... This guy needs a holiday....
Ohhh... he is on holiday.. Maybe it takes a few days to unwind...
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Ford Maverick GLX 1995 2.7TD LWB in illusion silver, 98k miles. Owned since new, for 22 years. Best car I have ever owned. Just wish I could drive it more. |
21-10-2015, 13:01 | #5 |
Senior Member
Join Date: May 2013
Location: South Yorkshire..
Vehicle: Nissan Terrano MK 2 SE
Posts: 1,757
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Twas funny...
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