Banned from sainsbury`s

[iandouglas]

Banned from Sainsbury's

Didn't like shopping there anyway,
Yesterday I was at my local Sainsbury's store buying a large bag of Winalot dog food for my loyal pet and was in the checkout queue when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

What did she think I had an elephant? So, since I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Winalot Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn’t, because I ended up in hospital last time, but I'd lost 2 stone before I woke up in intensive care with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pockets with Winalot nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in queue was now
enthralled with my story.)

Horrified, she asked me if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me I told her no, I stepped off the kerb to sniff an Irish Setter's arse and a car hit me.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was
laughing so hard. I'm now banned from Sainsbury's.

Better watch what you ask retired people.

They have all the time in the world to think of daft things to say.

 

[supergnome]

Which Saimsurys

 

[supergnome]

Sorry ...joining the senile gang.

 

[laurieash]

Sainsburys

Nice one Ian cheered me up,carnt wait for my Retirment:lol
Laurie.

 

[96terrano]

Retired people have really good storys to tell

 

[briggie]

the other day my wife and I went into town and went into a shop. We were only in there for about 5 minutes. When we came out, there was a policeman writing out a parking ticket. We went up to him and said, 'Come on, how about giving a senior citizen a break?' He ignored us and continued writing the ticket. I called him a Nazi turd.
He glared at me and started writing another ticket for having worn tyres.
So my wife called him a shit-head. He finished the second ticket and put it on the windscreen with the first. Then he started writing a third ticket. This went on for about 20 minutes. The more we abused him, the more tickets he wrote.
Personally, we didn't care. We came into town by bus.
We try to have a little fun each day now that we're retired. It's important at our age.