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some of us don't have a 4x4 anymore , in fact my car doesn't even like slightly damp roads lol :o

i would gladly contribute to help offset ricks losses to help restore his faith in our forum :thumb2

silly post , you are part of the furniture :D

My wife has worked as a magician's assistant for years now. I think she has picked up a few tricks. I came home from work early today and she was in the bedroom. She said, "Abracadabra!" and my mate, Dave, came out of the wardrobe, stark naked. Poor bloke must have wondered what the hell was...

im on my jollies in Norfolk :D

Paddy and Mick fancied a pint or two but didn't have a lot of money between them, they could only raise the staggering sum of one Euro. Mick said 'Hang on, I have an idea.' He went next door to the butcher's shop and came out with one large sausage. Paddy said 'Are you crazy? Now we don't have...

Been listening to some yeee haaah, country music, and it inspired me to write another five minute poem. Here is is. Don't expect Keats. Sing it to the same tune as the famous counttry song, El Paso Down at the Mexican Deli, El Paso I fell in love with a sweet Bradford girl She had big lips with...

does this mean you are leaving us zippy ? :naughty:augie:lol

Anyone got a owners manual for a girlfriend ? Mines giving off a terrible whining noise!

Husband and wife were waiting at the bus stop with their nine children. A blind man joins them after a few minutes. When the bus arrives, they find it overloaded and only the wife and the nine kids are able to fit onto the bus. So the husband and the blind man decide to walk. After a while, the...

"You're going to have to change the ringtone on your phone," my wife said to me. "What's wrong with knock knock knocking on heavens door..?" I said. "You know I love that song." "You work in a Nursing Home for **** sake!" She replied.

A Girl was towelling her wet pussy. She enjoyed it so much that she began to rub it vigorously until... ...the pussy cried "Meow" and runs away. Moral Lessons 1. Be kind to Animals 2. Always keep your thoughts clean

After six months or so of almost total isolation, someone knocks on his door.He opens it and a huge, bearded man is standing there. ''Name's Lars, your neighbour from forty miles up the road. Having a Christmas party Friday night. Thought you might like to come. About 5:00." "Great", says Tom...

I just bought 2 goldfish..,I'm naming them One and Two....So,if One dies,I still have Two left...:augie

I read that, by law, you have to turn on your headlights when it's raining in Sweden. How am I supposed to know if it's raining in Sweden?..:augie

Yesterday morning I bought two cases of beer on sale at the supermarket. I placed them on the front seat and headed back home. I stopped at a service station where a drop-dead gorgeous blonde was filling up her car at the next pump. Although it was very cold she was wearing a very short skirt...

A man sees a sign outside a house: 'Talking Dog For Sale'....He rings the bell, the owner appears and tells him the dog can be viewed in the back garden. The man sees a very nice looking Black Labrador Retriever sitting there. "Do you really talk?" He asks the dog. "Yes!" The Labrador replies...

we had a 2.8 intercooler ......... 2 head gaskets in 3 weeks :eek:

Once upon a time, in a land far away, a beautiful, independent, self-assured Princess happened upon a frog as she sat, contemplating ecological issues on the shores of an unpolluted pond in a verdant meadow near her castle. The frog hopped into the Princess' lap and said: "Elegant Lady, I was...

:jesterbg:roflol: