Go Back   :::.Nissan 4x4 Owners Club.::: > General > The Clubs Virtual Pub > Jokes humor and fun

Jokes humor and fun Keep it clean(ish)

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 06-07-2014, 08:47   #1
rustic
Senior Member
Click here to find out how to become a paid up member
 
rustic's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Staffordshire
Vehicle: Maverick Mk I 2.7 TD LWB
Posts: 7,825
Default Sunday morning quiz, how sharp are you?

To test your mental acuity, answer the following questions

1. Johnny’s mother had three children. The first child was named April. The second child was named May. What was the third child’s name?

2. A clerk at a butcher shop stands five feet ten inches tall and wears size 13 sneakers. What does he weigh?

3. Before Mt. Everest was discovered, what was the highest mountain in the world?

4. How much dirt is there in a hole that measures two feet by three feet by four feet?

5. What word in the English language is always spelled incorrectly?

6. Billie was born on December 28th, yet her birthday always falls in the summer. How is this possible?

7. In British Columbia you cannot take a picture of a man with a wooden leg. Why not?

8. If you were running a race and you passed the person in 2nd place, what place would you be in now?

9. Which is correct to say, “The yolk of the egg is white” or “The yolk of the egg are white?”

10. A farmer has five haystacks in one field and four haystacks in another. How many haystacks would he have if he combined them all in one.



Most are obvious, if some are not answered correctly, I will post them later on..
Rustic
__________________
Ford Maverick GLX 1995 2.7TD LWB in illusion silver, 98k miles. Owned since new, for 22 years.
Best car I have ever owned.
Just wish I could drive it more.
rustic is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-07-2014, 08:55   #2
jims-terrano
Senior Member
Click here to find out how to become a paid up member
 
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: UK
Posts: 12,965
Default

You missed the one about the 19 year old terrano and wax oil
jims-terrano is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-07-2014, 09:16   #3
rustic
Senior Member
Click here to find out how to become a paid up member
 
rustic's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Staffordshire
Vehicle: Maverick Mk I 2.7 TD LWB
Posts: 7,825
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by jims-terrano View Post
You missed the one about the 19 year old terrano and wax oil
Yes but that's not a joke, and I never joke about it...
Just mention it at every possible opportunity...

Remember.... I didn't bring it up this time though...
__________________
Ford Maverick GLX 1995 2.7TD LWB in illusion silver, 98k miles. Owned since new, for 22 years.
Best car I have ever owned.
Just wish I could drive it more.
rustic is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-07-2014, 09:21   #4
rustic
Senior Member
Click here to find out how to become a paid up member
 
rustic's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Staffordshire
Vehicle: Maverick Mk I 2.7 TD LWB
Posts: 7,825
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by jims-terrano View Post
You missed the one about the 19 year old terrano and wax oil
But here is a joke...

What is just over 19 years old, covered in waxoyl?














Ryan, when he undersealed his old "96 Terrano" ...

__________________
Ford Maverick GLX 1995 2.7TD LWB in illusion silver, 98k miles. Owned since new, for 22 years.
Best car I have ever owned.
Just wish I could drive it more.
rustic is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-07-2014, 11:35   #5
jonela
Senior Member
Click here to find out how to become a paid up member
 
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Chateaunef du Faou, France
Vehicle: 2000 LWB SE+
Posts: 906
Default

This is very good ,it took me a bit of time but got them all in the end
I think the hardest are the Butchers Clark and Billie's birthday
Good one Rustic
jonela is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-07-2014, 11:43   #6
rustic
Senior Member
Click here to find out how to become a paid up member
 
rustic's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Staffordshire
Vehicle: Maverick Mk I 2.7 TD LWB
Posts: 7,825
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by jonela View Post
This is very good ,it took me a bit of time but got them all in the end :
I think the hardest are the Butchers Clark and Billie's birthday
Good one Rustic
I still get stuck on No.1 Name of next child...
And I know the answer
Sometimes you don't listen to what you read..
You make assumptions, sometimes missing the obvious.


A lesson in life in general..
__________________
Ford Maverick GLX 1995 2.7TD LWB in illusion silver, 98k miles. Owned since new, for 22 years.
Best car I have ever owned.
Just wish I could drive it more.
rustic is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-07-2014, 14:27   #7
kitchenman
Senior Member
Click here to find out how to become a paid up member
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Essex Wescliff
Vehicle: maverick 1994 2.7 TD
Posts: 1,278
Default

Johhny
Meat
Mt Everest
None
Incorrectly
Lives south of equator
You neet a camera
2nd
Neither
One
kitchenman is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-07-2014, 14:37   #8
jonela
Senior Member
Click here to find out how to become a paid up member
 
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Chateaunef du Faou, France
Vehicle: 2000 LWB SE+
Posts: 906
Default

Awwww , Spoilt it now
jonela is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-07-2014, 15:05   #9
rustic
Senior Member
Click here to find out how to become a paid up member
 
rustic's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Staffordshire
Vehicle: Maverick Mk I 2.7 TD LWB
Posts: 7,825
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by kitchenman View Post
Johhny
Meat
Mt Everest
None
Incorrectly
Lives south of equator
You neet a camera
2nd
Neither
One
Well it was a Sunday "MORNING" quiz



Well done.

Answers

1. Johnny.
2. Meat.
3. Mt. Everest. It just wasn’t discovered yet.
4. There is no dirt in a hole.
5. Incorrectly (except when it is spelled incorrecktly).
6. Billie lives in the southern hemisphere.
7. You can’t take a picture with a wooden leg. You need a camera (or iPad or cell phone) to take a picture.
8. You would be in 2nd place. You passed the person in second place, not first.
9. Neither. Egg yolks are yellow.
10. One. If he combines all his haystacks, they all become one big stack.
__________________
Ford Maverick GLX 1995 2.7TD LWB in illusion silver, 98k miles. Owned since new, for 22 years.
Best car I have ever owned.
Just wish I could drive it more.
rustic is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On

Forum Jump


All times are GMT +1. The time now is 22:24.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.11
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions Inc.
Images online photo albums