13-07-2010, 19:24 | #1 |
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Police warning
Warning Issued By Yorkshire Police:
Clubbers in West Yorkshire have taken to using dental syringes to inject Ecstasy directly into their mouths. This dangerous practice is known as 'E by gum' and should be reported immediately. |
13-07-2010, 22:21 | #2 | |
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Quote:
Think your fall has affected your memory Briggie ;O) http://www.nissan4x4ownersclub.com/f...ead.php?t=8243 Brian |
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13-07-2010, 22:28 | #3 | |
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Quote:
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13-07-2010, 22:36 | #4 |
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how about this then ?
The new Liverpool manager sent scouts out around the world looking for a new striker to replace Michael Owen and hopefully win Liverpool the title. One of the scouts informs him of a young Iraqi striker who he thinks will turn out to be a true superstar. The Liverpool manager flies to Baghdad to watch him and is suitably impressed and arranges for him to come over to Anfield. Two weeks later Liverpool are 4-0 down to Man Utd with only 20 mins left. The manager gives the young Iraqi striker the nod and on he goes.
The lad is a sensation, scores 5 goals in 20 mins and wins the game for Liverpool. The fans are delighted, the players and coaches are delighted and the media love the new star. When the player comes off the pitch he phones his mum to tell her about his first day in English football. "Hello mum, guess what?" he says. "I played for 20 mins today, we were 4-0 down but I scored 5 goals and we won. Everybody loves me, the fans, the media, they all love me." "Wonderful," says his mum, "Let me tell you about my day. Your father got shot in the street, your sister and I were ambushed and beaten and your brother has joined a gang of looters, while you were having a great time." The young lad is very upset, "What can I say mum, but I'm so sorry." "Sorry!" says his mum, "It's your fault we moved to Liverpool in the first place!" |
13-07-2010, 22:48 | #5 |
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13-07-2010, 23:10 | #6 |
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Location: peoples democratic republic of west yorkshire
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New Panties
A frustrated wife buys a pair of crotchless panties in an attempt to spice up her dead sex-life. She puts them on, together with a short skirt and sits on the sofa opposite her husband. At strategic moments she uncrosses her legs ... enough times that her husband finally asks, "Are you wearing crotchless panties?" "Y-e-s," she answers with a seductive smile. "Thank God - I thought you were sitting on the cat." He never heard the gunshot. |
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