Go Back   :::.Nissan 4x4 Owners Club.::: > General > The Clubs Virtual Pub > Jokes humor and fun

Jokes humor and fun Keep it clean(ish)

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 18-07-2015, 17:09   #1
briggie
Senior Member
Click here to find out how to become a paid up member
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: peoples democratic republic of west yorkshire
Vehicle: " alice "
Posts: 10,473
Red face court case

Defense Attorney: What is your age?

Little Old Woman: I am 86 years old.

Defense Attorney: Will you tell us, in your own words, what happened to you?

Little Old Woman: There I was, sitting there in my swing on my front porch on a warm spring evening, when a young man comes creeping up on the porch and sat down beside me.

Defense Attorney: Did you know him?

Little Old Woman: No, but he sure was friendly.

Defense Attorney: What happened after he sat down beside you?

Little Old Woman: He started to rub my thigh.

Defense Attorney: Did you stop him?

Little Old Woman: No, I didn’t stop him.

Defense Attorney: Why not?

Little Old Woman: It felt good. Nobody had done that since my Abner passed away 30 years ago.

Defense Attorney: What happened next?

Little Old Woman: He began to rub my breasts.

Defense Attorney: Did you stop him then?
Little Old Woman: No, I did not stop him.

Defense Attorney: Why not?

Little Old Woman: Why, Your Honor, his rubbing made me feel all alive and excited. I haven’t felt that good in years.

Defense! Attorney: What happened next?

Little Old Woman: Well, I was feeling so spicy that I just spread my old legs and said to him, “Take me, young man, Take me!”

Defense Attorney: Did he take you?

Little Old Woman: Hell, no. That’s when he yelled, “April Fool!”….And that’s when I shot the son of a bitch!
briggie is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 18-07-2015, 17:16   #2
johnb5177
Senior Member
Click here to find out how to become a paid up member
 
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Swansea, S.Wales
Vehicle: 02Terrano II 3.0 SVE Auto
Posts: 1,586
Default

johnb5177 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 18-07-2015, 21:07   #3
solarman216
Off road maniac
Click here to find out how to become a paid up member
 
solarman216's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Bexhill on Sea
Vehicle: Y60 Patrol Me, 3 ltr Mrs
Posts: 17,431
Default

, Maggs loved it too, Rick
__________________
Ex banger racer now off road maniac
Lokka on the front with manual hubs
Diff lock on rear
3 inch SS straight through exhaust
Manly winch bumper with 13000 lb winch
10 spike ground anchor, with multiple straps and blocks
Super strong body cills capped with scaffold pole
20% stronger springs all round
aggressive off road tyres on wheels so just swap.
Aim to get stuck and be completely self sufficient in extraction, love getting muddy, 2ft deep is good but rare.
solarman216 is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On

Forum Jump


All times are GMT +1. The time now is 20:25.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.11
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions Inc.
Images online photo albums