rude joke time

briggie · 10-11-2015, 12:54

A woman is walking past a pet shop where she notices a sign:
"Good home needed for clitoris-licking frog."
The woman goes inside and says to the shopkeeper,
"I noticed you have a clitoris-licking frog? I'll take one."
He packages up a frog. The woman sneaks out the door and rushes home. She gets home... takes out the instructions and reads them carefully doing exactly what it says to do.
Take a shower. Put on some nice smelling perfume.
Put on a very sexy nightie.
Get into bed, spread your legs and put the frog down "THERE"
To her surprise, nothing happens. So, she thought, perhaps the scent she chose is not appealing to the frog... So, she showers again... and tries another perfume. She gets back into bed, puts the frog between her legs and, NOTHING.
She's totally frustrated and pissed off at this point. She reads the instructions again thinking that there might be something she overlooked. At the bottom of the paper it says... If you have any problems or questions, please call the pet store. So, she does. The man behind the counter says, "I've had a few complaints earlier today, I'll be right over to check out the problem". A few minutes later he knocks on the door. He enters and says, "You'll have to show me exactly what you did". She does. She showers, puts on the perfume and the Teddy, gets into bed... and puts the frog between her legs. NOTHING HAPPENS.
She says, "see, I've done everything according to the instructions and the damn thing just sits there." The man looking very concerned, picks up the frog, looks directly into its eyes and says, "I'M ONLY GOING TO SHOW YOU HOW TO DO THIS ONE MORE TIME!!.

10-11-2015, 12:54	#1
briggie Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: peoples democratic republic of west yorkshire Vehicle: " alice " Posts: 10,473	rude joke time A woman is walking past a pet shop where she notices a sign: "Good home needed for clitoris-licking frog." The woman goes inside and says to the shopkeeper, "I noticed you have a clitoris-licking frog? I'll take one." He packages up a frog. The woman sneaks out the door and rushes home. She gets home... takes out the instructions and reads them carefully doing exactly what it says to do. Take a shower. Put on some nice smelling perfume. Put on a very sexy nightie. Get into bed, spread your legs and put the frog down "THERE" To her surprise, nothing happens. So, she thought, perhaps the scent she chose is not appealing to the frog... So, she showers again... and tries another perfume. She gets back into bed, puts the frog between her legs and, NOTHING. She's totally frustrated and pissed off at this point. She reads the instructions again thinking that there might be something she overlooked. At the bottom of the paper it says... If you have any problems or questions, please call the pet store. So, she does. The man behind the counter says, "I've had a few complaints earlier today, I'll be right over to check out the problem". A few minutes later he knocks on the door. He enters and says, "You'll have to show me exactly what you did". She does. She showers, puts on the perfume and the Teddy, gets into bed... and puts the frog between her legs. NOTHING HAPPENS. She says, "see, I've done everything according to the instructions and the damn thing just sits there." The man looking very concerned, picks up the frog, looks directly into its eyes and says, "I'M ONLY GOING TO SHOW YOU HOW TO DO THIS ONE MORE TIME!!.