Great answers

[Deleted Member D]

Answers from a childrens science exam
>
> Q: Name the four seasons.
> A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.
>
> Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to
> drink.
> A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large poll
> utants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.
>
> Q: How is dew formed?
> A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.
>
> Q: How can you delay milk turning sour?
> A: Keep it in the cow.
>
> Q: What causes the tides in the oceans?
> A: The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All water
> tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon,

> and nature hates a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight.
>
> Q: What are steroids?
> A: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs.
>
> Q: What happens to your body as you age?
> A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.
>
> Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?
> A: He says good-bye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery.
>
> Q: Name a major disease associated with cigarettes.
> A: Premature death.
>
> Q: How are the main parts of the body categorized? ( e. g., abdomen)
> A: The body is consisted into three parts -- the brainium, the borax
> and the abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain; the borax
> contains the heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains the
> five bowels A, E, I, O, and U.
>
> Q: What is the fibula?
> A: A small lie.
>
> Q: What does 'varicose' mean?
> A: Nearby.
>
> Q: Give the meaning of the term 'Caesarian Section.'
> A: The Caesarian Section is a district in Rome
>
> Q: What does the word 'benign' mean?'
> A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight.
>
> ____________________________________
> Kids Are Quick
> ____________________________________
> TEACHER: Mari a, go to the map and findNorth America
> MARIA: Here it is.
> TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America ?
> CLASS: Maria.
> ____________________________________
>
> TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the
> floor?
> JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.
> ____________________________________
>
> TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell 'crocodile?'
> GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L'
> TEACHER: No, that's wrong
> GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.
> ____________________________________
>
> TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
> DONALD: H I J K L M N O.
> TEACHER: What are you talking about?
> DONALD: Yesterday you said it's H to O.
> ____________________________________
>
> TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we
> didn't have ten years ago.
> WINNIE: Me!
> ____________________________________
>
> TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty?
> GLEN: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.
> ____________________________________
>
> TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with ' I. '
> MILLIE: I is..
> TEACHER : No, Millie..... Always say, 'I am.'
> MILLIE: All right... 'I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.
> ____________________________________
>
> TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's
> cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his
> father didn't punish him?
> LOUIS: Because George still had the axe in his hand.
> ____________________________________
>
> TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before
> eating?
> SIMON: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.
> ____________________________________
>
> TEACHER: Clyde , your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same
> as your brother's. Did you copy his?
> CLYDE : No, sir. It's the same dog.