Bit of advice?

clivvy · 11-06-2010, 20:59

Had a funny one today, will cut a long story short. Neighbours and I share a drive that goes front to back. We both have right of way. A few years ago he tarmacced over the concrete drive on HIS "half" and we sort of fell out. Every now and then I move one of my cars down the drive towards the back so I can swap overvthe cars we have. Today I came home and did just that. Neighbours mum who lives at the house came home from a long holiday and her son, the one we have trouble with, came banging on the door. Basically he threatened me, said the land was his and I didn't ask to park the car there and he said don't park there any more. He got very intense because I started to explain that I meant no harm and thought it was ok as it was temporary. He then threatened me, and said if I did it again, he would pull it off the drive himself. At thus point I said don't threaten me, he said I am threatening you, and I said don't, and don't you touch my car, he then continued with his threat and said he would pull it off the drive. I told him to speak to his solicitor to get things clear because perhaps I have mis understood the agreement for the drive. I understand that yes, the land is probably his and I have right of way, but at the front, half is mine if that is how he wants to be.
My issue is, the threats. I don't mind being asked nit to use it as a parking spot, which I don't, but I need advice on the threat. Is there anything I can do at all? He's made myself and my girlfriend a but scared, and put us on edge, now I am worried that the next time I use the drive for access, and leave the car for a short time, he's going to damage it. Should I seek legal advice, report to police or leave it alone? Problem is we are now on edge over it, and very upset...

Deleted account DD · 11-06-2010, 21:07

Police will advise or deal on public order/criminal/violence/threats etc.

Seek advice from a solicitor re access, its a civil matter

Dont get upset over him. Dick heads like that are ten a penny and they always get their come uppance eventually

(RIP) PLANK · 11-06-2010, 21:13

Living in fear is one of the worst thing people have to endure.

Try to let it go, he has probably calmed down now and feels a bit stupid but isn't brave enough to admit it.

Probably had a bad day and taking it out on you.

Not much help but i do try

paulp · 11-06-2010, 21:44

if you own the house look at the deeds and plans

other than that tell him B@LL@X as he has no right to threaten you and advise him that if he does it again you will report it to the police.

Avoid solicitors if possible they look at this kind of dispute as a licence to print money

PS if the front half is yours he is also screwed so it may also be wise to get a written agreement between the both of you.

paulp

tezzer · 11-06-2010, 22:09

do you have legal cover with your insurance or breakdown provider? if you do contact them for free advice and possibly a letter to put the fear of christ up him over the threats, if you dont have cover phone the RAC and take it out it costs around £25.00 and covers all legal matters, and not just motoring,.

larson · 11-06-2010, 22:13

report it to the police then you have a record of the incident if anything does happen or you can do b.

knock the **** out and stamp onhis nuts.

larson

BigBlack · 11-06-2010, 22:24

You need to look on your deeds and see if it is a right of way, or a shared drive. Basically neither of you have any right to park on it if its classed as a right of way, or access to the rear... that said though theirs no need for this t**ser to come giving it large - aint he ever parked on it for a while?

If its a shared drive its just that 'shared' so their aint no 'his side' or your side!

Does the lad live in the house? I'd be interested in what he's gonna use to 'pull' your car of the drive. Pretty sure thats criminal damage!?!?

This site might be a good read for you.... Garden Law Forum lots of solicitors / conveyours etc on it and its free!

Failing that you aint too far from me.... want me to come park a 6 ton tractor on your drive and tell the c*nt to move that!

larson · 11-06-2010, 22:27

bigblack you have a tractor? do you have any rabbits and can i have them?

sorry to take the thred of track but i cant resist a bunny

larson

BigBlack · 11-06-2010, 22:36

Strictly speaking I personally dont... but father-in-law has a couple....

Bunnys??? You wanting live ones or dead?

Just a second thought on this.... football tomorrow... maybe buy him a 4 pack of beer, go knock on the door, appologies for parking their and say you didnt think he would of minded as it was only for a short while... get onto talking about the footy and give him the beers as a peice offering.....

(RIP) PLANK · 11-06-2010, 22:52

Quote:

Originally Posted by BigBlack

Just a second thought on this.... football tomorrow... maybe buy him a 4 pack of beer, go knock on the door, appologies for parking their and say you didnt think he would of minded as it was only for a short while... get onto talking about the footy and give him the beers as a peice offering.....

got to be worth a try, save a whole load of stress!

clivvy · 11-06-2010, 23:18

Thanks for all the replys guys, I certainly won't be taking any beers down his house because he's a twat and I really don't like him. I'm going to seal advice on Sunday firstly via that website big black posted. I need some facts based on the deeds I have, I need to know if it's his half I have access over, or is it just shared. Once I have facts, I'm going to speak to a solicitor or the police about the threats, and get the details of the deads made clear to him, and a warning given to stay the hell away from me. I hate bullies like him, I'm only a skinny guy, I can't possibly defend myself against him but he's made me feel physically threatened.

extreme-4x4 · 11-06-2010, 23:42

tricky one.... had similar myself.

fact is you are where you are. whats done is done. and coppers wont do bugger all. even if they turn up... so with all said and done

the best option you have is next time you see him is to say
" have you calmed down yet"
in a very dry jack dee type of styleeeee

this will show the bully.
you are not scared
he's been an arse
and you want to talk about your issues rationally.

making the first move giving him the option to respond nicely rather than more conflict...

could save you years of hell living with neighbours from hell . avoid solicitors

but he could go in reach for his big gun collection and start shooting the town up. and the police will get involved. eventually. if he kills enough people... only joking on this bit

macabethiel · 12-06-2010, 07:58

You have had a lot of sound advice and as a retired Custody Sergeant with personal experience of problems with my neighbour on one side I will post my thoughts.

Firstly, if he moves your vehicle that is classed as an unauthorised taking of the vehicle he does not have to drive it or sit in the vehicle to commit the offence. Pushing or towing can amount to unuathorised taking under the Theft Act contrary to common belief he does not need to drive it as such. He would have a defence in law if he claimed the vehicle was on his land even if the land turned out not to be his as long as his belief was "honestly held" as the law calls it.

If he moved your vehicle then you must call the Police and get them to deal with your complaint. In all honesty they would probably try to resolve the situation without court action as long as you agreed.

Trouble is once the Police get involved be it due to a breach of the peace or harrassment then things tend to get worse. If you are a sensitive person then moving house seems like the only solution.

I had a period of two years where my neighbour and his wife would not speak to me after I built my double garage and he refused to give me right of access during the building work. It was really uncomfortable to ignore someone if we both happened to be on the front garden together. We are now on head nodding terms only !

If the house was built with shared drive access then the Land Registry Entry or the Deeds if it is an older house should clarify the situation. You can usually get a copy of the document from the Mortgage Company for a small fee. If the shared drive has been done after the house was built without a legal agreement but by way of common useage then it maybe more complicated. Either way if you have a right and he is denying it you that does not help much.

I would try to avoid letters from solicitors even if you can afford it as this tends to entrench the situation and if he is an unreasonable person or a bully it gives him a sort of defiant control of the situation.

If he does not live at the house then at the earliest opportunity I would try to speak to whoever lives at the house so they know what has happened and put my views calmly and fairly. I wrote to my neighbour as the first step as this has the advantage that you can get your point across without raised voices or interuption and you can re-read a letter but peoples memory of a conversation can become less than acurate.

Hope this helps.

patbhoy · 12-06-2010, 10:23

Tell him to take a chill pill, wether you were parked there rightly or wrongly he has no right to threaten you.
Report the matter to the police and get it on record also let them know that you are living in fear of both damage to property and personally, they will hopefully send a community officer to speak to him and he will then be aware that you are not going to put up with his threats.
It wont make for a pleasant atmosphere in which to live but it may make him think twice about further threats.

clivvy · 13-06-2010, 00:34

going to report to police, if only to get advice on what he can or cant do. going to check deeds to make sure the "divide" he has created using tarmac (half tarmacced the drive) is correct and precise. Need to find out if him doing this breaks the agreement of shared access. Hes adament its his land, which is fine if its true, but he never went through anything with us when dividing it up, he just did it even though we said dont. He was threatening, he even said "i will threaten you" and its that, that has scared me. I dont like to be threatened because I didnt deserve it. see what the police say. I did make sure I told him "do not touch my car" and told him to go to his solicitor about the matter (he claimed his maybe is a solicitor and hes told him all he needs to know, wonder if that included a few threats?).

Im not going to let the matter rest, but all I am going to do is check the land deeds and the tarmac issue and if he is allowed to threaten me and what he can do if I do park my car there etc etc, need to be clear about things so I can be happy.

11-06-2010, 20:59	#1
clivvy Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: Huddersfield Vehicle: Terrano 03 LWB Posts: 6,947	Bit of advice? Had a funny one today, will cut a long story short. Neighbours and I share a drive that goes front to back. We both have right of way. A few years ago he tarmacced over the concrete drive on HIS "half" and we sort of fell out. Every now and then I move one of my cars down the drive towards the back so I can swap overvthe cars we have. Today I came home and did just that. Neighbours mum who lives at the house came home from a long holiday and her son, the one we have trouble with, came banging on the door. Basically he threatened me, said the land was his and I didn't ask to park the car there and he said don't park there any more. He got very intense because I started to explain that I meant no harm and thought it was ok as it was temporary. He then threatened me, and said if I did it again, he would pull it off the drive himself. At thus point I said don't threaten me, he said I am threatening you, and I said don't, and don't you touch my car, he then continued with his threat and said he would pull it off the drive. I told him to speak to his solicitor to get things clear because perhaps I have mis understood the agreement for the drive. I understand that yes, the land is probably his and I have right of way, but at the front, half is mine if that is how he wants to be. My issue is, the threats. I don't mind being asked nit to use it as a parking spot, which I don't, but I need advice on the threat. Is there anything I can do at all? He's made myself and my girlfriend a but scared, and put us on edge, now I am worried that the next time I use the drive for access, and leave the car for a short time, he's going to damage it. Should I seek legal advice, report to police or leave it alone? Problem is we are now on edge over it, and very upset...

11-06-2010, 21:44	#4
paulp Senior Member Join Date: Apr 2009 Location: essex Vehicle: nissan mistral 27td Posts: 1,043	drive if you own the house look at the deeds and plans other than that tell him B@LL@X as he has no right to threaten you and advise him that if he does it again you will report it to the police. Avoid solicitors if possible they look at this kind of dispute as a licence to print money PS if the front half is yours he is also screwed so it may also be wise to get a written agreement between the both of you. paulp

12-06-2010, 07:58	#13
macabethiel Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2008 Location: Derby Vehicle: Freelander & Jeep GC 3.0 Posts: 4,416	Shared driveway You have had a lot of sound advice and as a retired Custody Sergeant with personal experience of problems with my neighbour on one side I will post my thoughts. Firstly, if he moves your vehicle that is classed as an unauthorised taking of the vehicle he does not have to drive it or sit in the vehicle to commit the offence. Pushing or towing can amount to unuathorised taking under the Theft Act contrary to common belief he does not need to drive it as such. He would have a defence in law if he claimed the vehicle was on his land even if the land turned out not to be his as long as his belief was "honestly held" as the law calls it. If he moved your vehicle then you must call the Police and get them to deal with your complaint. In all honesty they would probably try to resolve the situation without court action as long as you agreed. Trouble is once the Police get involved be it due to a breach of the peace or harrassment then things tend to get worse. If you are a sensitive person then moving house seems like the only solution. I had a period of two years where my neighbour and his wife would not speak to me after I built my double garage and he refused to give me right of access during the building work. It was really uncomfortable to ignore someone if we both happened to be on the front garden together. We are now on head nodding terms only ! If the house was built with shared drive access then the Land Registry Entry or the Deeds if it is an older house should clarify the situation. You can usually get a copy of the document from the Mortgage Company for a small fee. If the shared drive has been done after the house was built without a legal agreement but by way of common useage then it maybe more complicated. Either way if you have a right and he is denying it you that does not help much. I would try to avoid letters from solicitors even if you can afford it as this tends to entrench the situation and if he is an unreasonable person or a bully it gives him a sort of defiant control of the situation. If he does not live at the house then at the earliest opportunity I would try to speak to whoever lives at the house so they know what has happened and put my views calmly and fairly. I wrote to my neighbour as the first step as this has the advantage that you can get your point across without raised voices or interuption and you can re-read a letter but peoples memory of a conversation can become less than acurate. Hope this helps.

11-06-2010, 21:07	#2
Deleted account DD Senior Member Join Date: Sep 2008 Posts: 4,705	Police will advise or deal on public order/criminal/violence/threats etc. Seek advice from a solicitor re access, its a civil matter Dont get upset over him. Dick heads like that are ten a penny and they always get their come uppance eventually

11-06-2010, 21:13	#3
(RIP) PLANK Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Central England, in the Heart of the Black Country Vehicle: T2 2004 TDI SE LWB Posts: 7,740	Living in fear is one of the worst thing people have to endure. Try to let it go, he has probably calmed down now and feels a bit stupid but isn't brave enough to admit it. Probably had a bad day and taking it out on you. Not much help but i do try

11-06-2010, 22:09	#5
tezzer Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: basildon essex Vehicle: transit camper van 1987 Posts: 2,829	do you have legal cover with your insurance or breakdown provider? if you do contact them for free advice and possibly a letter to put the fear of christ up him over the threats, if you dont have cover phone the RAC and take it out it costs around £25.00 and covers all legal matters, and not just motoring,.

11-06-2010, 22:13	#6
larson Senior Member Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: moomin vally Posts: 1,138	report it to the police then you have a record of the incident if anything does happen or you can do b. knock the **** out and stamp onhis nuts. larson

11-06-2010, 22:24	#7
BigBlack Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: West Yorkshire Vehicle: 2005 Terrano II 2.7tdi SE Posts: 568	You need to look on your deeds and see if it is a right of way, or a shared drive. Basically neither of you have any right to park on it if its classed as a right of way, or access to the rear... that said though theirs no need for this t*ser to come giving it large - aint he ever parked on it for a while? If its a shared drive its just that 'shared' so their aint no 'his side' or your side! Does the lad live in the house? I'd be interested in what he's gonna use to 'pull' your car of the drive. Pretty sure thats criminal damage!?!? This site might be a good read for you.... Garden Law Forum lots of solicitors / conveyours etc on it and its free! Failing that you aint too far from me.... want me to come park a 6 ton tractor on your drive and tell the cnt to move that!

11-06-2010, 22:27	#8
larson Senior Member Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: moomin vally Posts: 1,138	bigblack you have a tractor? do you have any rabbits and can i have them? sorry to take the thred of track but i cant resist a bunny larson

11-06-2010, 22:36	#9
BigBlack Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: West Yorkshire Vehicle: 2005 Terrano II 2.7tdi SE Posts: 568	Strictly speaking I personally dont... but father-in-law has a couple.... Bunnys??? You wanting live ones or dead? Just a second thought on this.... football tomorrow... maybe buy him a 4 pack of beer, go knock on the door, appologies for parking their and say you didnt think he would of minded as it was only for a short while... get onto talking about the footy and give him the beers as a peice offering.....

11-06-2010, 23:18	#11
clivvy Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: Huddersfield Vehicle: Terrano 03 LWB Posts: 6,947	Thanks for all the replys guys, I certainly won't be taking any beers down his house because he's a twat and I really don't like him. I'm going to seal advice on Sunday firstly via that website big black posted. I need some facts based on the deeds I have, I need to know if it's his half I have access over, or is it just shared. Once I have facts, I'm going to speak to a solicitor or the police about the threats, and get the details of the deads made clear to him, and a warning given to stay the hell away from me. I hate bullies like him, I'm only a skinny guy, I can't possibly defend myself against him but he's made me feel physically threatened.

11-06-2010, 23:42	#12
extreme-4x4 Senior Member Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: WALES Posts: 6,295	tricky one.... had similar myself. fact is you are where you are. whats done is done. and coppers wont do bugger all. even if they turn up... so with all said and done the best option you have is next time you see him is to say " have you calmed down yet" in a very dry jack dee type of styleeeee this will show the bully. you are not scared he's been an arse and you want to talk about your issues rationally. making the first move giving him the option to respond nicely rather than more conflict... could save you years of hell living with neighbours from hell . avoid solicitors but he could go in reach for his big gun collection and start shooting the town up. and the police will get involved. eventually. if he kills enough people... only joking on this bit

12-06-2010, 10:23	#14
patbhoy Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: Bridge of Weir, Scotland Vehicle: Nissan Patrol GR SE 2.8TD Posts: 526	Tell him to take a chill pill, wether you were parked there rightly or wrongly he has no right to threaten you. Report the matter to the police and get it on record also let them know that you are living in fear of both damage to property and personally, they will hopefully send a community officer to speak to him and he will then be aware that you are not going to put up with his threats. It wont make for a pleasant atmosphere in which to live but it may make him think twice about further threats.

13-06-2010, 00:34	#15
clivvy Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: Huddersfield Vehicle: Terrano 03 LWB Posts: 6,947	going to report to police, if only to get advice on what he can or cant do. going to check deeds to make sure the "divide" he has created using tarmac (half tarmacced the drive) is correct and precise. Need to find out if him doing this breaks the agreement of shared access. Hes adament its his land, which is fine if its true, but he never went through anything with us when dividing it up, he just did it even though we said dont. He was threatening, he even said "i will threaten you" and its that, that has scared me. I dont like to be threatened because I didnt deserve it. see what the police say. I did make sure I told him "do not touch my car" and told him to go to his solicitor about the matter (he claimed his maybe is a solicitor and hes told him all he needs to know, wonder if that included a few threats?). Im not going to let the matter rest, but all I am going to do is check the land deeds and the tarmac issue and if he is allowed to threaten me and what he can do if I do park my car there etc etc, need to be clear about things so I can be happy.