its.....joke time !!!!

[briggie]

Many years ago on a long transatlantic flight, an elderly lady asked if she could visit the cockpit.

When she got up there, she found four crewmen. She asked the first what he did, and he explained that he was the navigator and what his responsibilities were.

She turned to next one and asked what he did. He explained that he was the engineer and his job was to monitor and troubleshoot any system problems to keep the flight operating smoothly.

She turned to the next one and asked what he did. He explained that as the captain he was responsible for everything on the airplane and the functioning of the crew.

She turned to the first officer and asked "Well young man, what is your job?"

He replied "Ma'am, I am the captain's sexual adviser."

Somewhat shocked, she said "I beg your pardon, what do you mean by that?"

"Very simple ma'am. The captain has told me that when he wants my ******* advice, he'll ask me."

[96terrano]

Originally Posted by briggie

Many years ago on a long transatlantic flight, an elderly lady asked if she could visit the cockpit.

When she got up there, she found four crewmen. She asked the first what he did, and he explained that he was the navigator and what his responsibilities were.

She turned to next one and asked what he did. He explained that he was the engineer and his job was to monitor and troubleshoot any system problems to keep the flight operating smoothly.

She turned to the next one and asked what he did. He explained that as the captain he was responsible for everything on the airplane and the functioning of the crew.

She turned to the first officer and asked "Well young man, what is your job?"

He replied "Ma'am, I am the captain's sexual adviser."

Somewhat shocked, she said "I beg your pardon, what do you mean by that?"

"Very simple ma'am. The captain has told me that when he wants my ******* advice, he'll ask me."

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[rustic]

In a train carriage there was an Englishman, a Frenchman, a spectacular looking blonde and a frightfully awful looking fat lady.

After several minutes of the trip the train happens to pass through a dark tunnel and the unmistakable sound of a slap is heard. When they leave the tunnel, the Frenchman has a big red slap mark on his cheek.

The blonde thought - "That French son of a bitch wanted to touch me and by a mistake, he must have put his hand on the fat lady, who in turn must have slapped his face."

The large lady thought - "This dirty old Frenchman laid his hands on the blonde and she smacked him."

The Frenchman thought - "That Englishman put his hand on that blonde and by a mistake she slapped me."

The Englishman thought - "I hope there's another tunnel soon, so I can smack that Frenchman again."

[Lazy-Ferret]