Go Back   :::.Nissan 4x4 Owners Club.::: > General > The Clubs Virtual Pub > Jokes humor and fun

Jokes humor and fun Keep it clean(ish)

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 29-10-2015, 15:29   #1
Dave_Askham
Member
Click here to find out how to become a paid up member
 
Join Date: Oct 2015
Location: North Lincolnshire
Vehicle: 05 Terrano 2.7 LWB
Posts: 60
Default The rectum stretcher!

A woman driving along at speed passed over a bridge only to find a cop with a radar gun on the other side lying in wait.

The cop pulled her over, walked up to the car, with that classic patronizing smirk & asked, 'What's your hurry?'

She replied, 'I'm late for work.'

'Oh yeah,' said the cop, 'what do you do?'

'I'm a Rectum Stretcher,' she responded.

The cop stammered, 'A what?............

'A Rectum Stretcher!'

'And just what does a rectum stretcher do?'

'Well,' she said, 'I start by inserting one finger in the rectum, then work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four,
then with my whole hand in I work from side to side until I can get both hands in,
and then I slowly but surely stretch it, until it's about 6 feet'

'And just what the hell do you do with a 6 foot asshole?' he asked



'You give him a radar gun & park him behind a bridge...'

Dave_Askham is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 29-10-2015, 16:53   #2
don simon
Senior Member
Click here to find out how to become a paid up member
 
Join Date: Oct 2014
Location: Gone.
Vehicle: Terrano ii
Posts: 2,215
Default

Opened the thread with trepidation.... Worth it though....

ps. When's Briggie back off holiday?
don simon is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 29-10-2015, 17:01   #3
Dave_Askham
Member
Click here to find out how to become a paid up member
 
Join Date: Oct 2015
Location: North Lincolnshire
Vehicle: 05 Terrano 2.7 LWB
Posts: 60
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by don simon View Post
Opened the thread with trepidation.... Worth it though....

ps. When's Briggie back off holiday?
if you're referring to Ian (ogri) ??? I think he'll be back tomorrow???
Dave_Askham is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 29-10-2015, 17:17   #4
don simon
Senior Member
Click here to find out how to become a paid up member
 
Join Date: Oct 2014
Location: Gone.
Vehicle: Terrano ii
Posts: 2,215
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dave_Askham View Post
if you're referring to Ian (ogri) ??? I think he'll be back tomorrow???
No, it's definitely Briggie who normally supplies the funnies....
don simon is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 29-10-2015, 18:51   #5
emjaybee
Senior Member
Click here to find out how to become a paid up member
 
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Oxfordshire
Vehicle: 3.0Di SVE '05 5 door.
Posts: 1,536
Default

Wondered where the title was taking us.

We like it, we like it a lot!!!

emjaybee is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On

Forum Jump


All times are GMT +1. The time now is 04:34.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.11
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions Inc.
Images online photo albums