-some thing to make you smile, maybe

zippy656 · 06-03-2009, 08:05

1. A vulture boards an airplane, carrying two dead raccoons. The stewardess looks at him and says, 'I'm sorry, sir, only one carrion allowed per passenger.'

2. Two fish swim into a concrete wall. The one turns to the other and says 'Dam!'

3 Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft. Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can't have your kayak and heat it too.

4. Two hydrogen atoms meet. One says 'I've lost my electron.' The other says 'Are you sure?' The first replies 'Yes, I'm positive.'

5. Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused Novocain during a root canal? His goal: to transcend dental medication.

6. A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse.
'But why?', they asked, as they moved off. 'Because,' he said, ' I can't stand chess-nuts boasting in an open foyer.'

7. Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him (Oh, man, this is so bad, it's good)....A super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.

wolf · 06-03-2009, 12:01

well it made me smile!! and i needed that! thanks Zippy

willow · 06-03-2009, 20:21

good one Zippy

thanks

06-03-2009, 08:05	#1
zippy656 Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2008 Location: Devizes Wiltshire Vehicle: Nissan Note Ntec 1.5 Posts: 14,138	-some thing to make you smile, maybe 1. A vulture boards an airplane, carrying two dead raccoons. The stewardess looks at him and says, 'I'm sorry, sir, only one carrion allowed per passenger.' 2. Two fish swim into a concrete wall. The one turns to the other and says 'Dam!' 3 Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft. Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can't have your kayak and heat it too. 4. Two hydrogen atoms meet. One says 'I've lost my electron.' The other says 'Are you sure?' The first replies 'Yes, I'm positive.' 5. Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused Novocain during a root canal? His goal: to transcend dental medication. 6. A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. 'But why?', they asked, as they moved off. 'Because,' he said, ' I can't stand chess-nuts boasting in an open foyer.' 7. Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him (Oh, man, this is so bad, it's good)....A super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.

06-03-2009, 12:01	#2
wolf Senior Member Join Date: May 2006 Location: Longford, Ireland Vehicle: Nissan Terrano II '98 Posts: 432	well it made me smile!! and i needed that! thanks Zippy __________________ Mods: Front Spots on Bull Bar, Sat Nav, All Purpose scanner with low profile aieral.

06-03-2009, 20:21	#3
willow Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: Norfolk East Vehicle: terrano11 1995 TD Posts: 1,955	good one Zippy thanks