lonely hearts

briggie · 07-07-2015, 14:50

A lonely woman, aged 70, decided that it was time to.get married. She put an ad in the local paper that read:
HUSBAND WANTED!

MUST BE IN MY AGE GROUP (70’s),

MUST NOT BEAT ME,MUST NOT RUN AROUND ON ME,

AND MUST STILL BE GOOD IN BED!

ALL APPLICANTS PLEASE APPLY IN PERSON.

On the second day she heard the doorbell. Much to her dismay, she opened the door to see a gray- haired gentleman with no arms or legs sitting in a wheelchair.

The old woman said, “You’re not really asking me to consider you, are you? Just look at you … you have no legs!”

The old man smiled, “Therefore I cannot run around on you!”

She snorted. “You don’t have any hands either!”

Again the old man smiled, “Nor can I beat you!”

She raised an eyebrow and gazed intently. “Are you still good in bed?”

With that, the old gentleman leaned back, beamed a big broad smile and said, “I rang the doorbell, didn’t I?”

johnb5177 · 07-07-2015, 16:24

Terranical · 07-07-2015, 17:10

Like it!

emjaybee · 07-07-2015, 21:53

I was having a crap day, it just got better!!!

macabethiel · 08-07-2015, 07:40

I didn't see that coming. lol

Ooops Freudian slip methinks !

rustic · 08-07-2015, 08:21

Quote:

Originally Posted by macabethiel

I didn't see that coming. lol

Ooops Freudian slip methinks !

I though it was going to be the one where a guy wanted one that touched the ground... lol

07-07-2015, 14:50	#1
briggie Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: peoples democratic republic of west yorkshire Vehicle: " alice " Posts: 10,473	lonely hearts A lonely woman, aged 70, decided that it was time to.get married. She put an ad in the local paper that read: HUSBAND WANTED! MUST BE IN MY AGE GROUP (70’s), MUST NOT BEAT ME,MUST NOT RUN AROUND ON ME, AND MUST STILL BE GOOD IN BED! ALL APPLICANTS PLEASE APPLY IN PERSON. On the second day she heard the doorbell. Much to her dismay, she opened the door to see a gray- haired gentleman with no arms or legs sitting in a wheelchair. The old woman said, “You’re not really asking me to consider you, are you? Just look at you … you have no legs!” The old man smiled, “Therefore I cannot run around on you!” She snorted. “You don’t have any hands either!” Again the old man smiled, “Nor can I beat you!” She raised an eyebrow and gazed intently. “Are you still good in bed?” With that, the old gentleman leaned back, beamed a big broad smile and said, “I rang the doorbell, didn’t I?”

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07-07-2015, 16:24	#2
johnb5177 Senior Member Join Date: Sep 2013 Location: Swansea, S.Wales Vehicle: 02Terrano II 3.0 SVE Auto Posts: 1,586

07-07-2015, 17:10	#3
Terranical Senior Member Join Date: Jun 2010 Location: Resident in Bristol, Terrano in Spain Vehicle: 1994 Terrano 2.7TD SWB Posts: 1,398	Like it!

07-07-2015, 21:53	#4
emjaybee Senior Member Join Date: Jul 2014 Location: Oxfordshire Vehicle: 3.0Di SVE '05 5 door. Posts: 1,536	I was having a crap day, it just got better!!!

08-07-2015, 07:40	#5
macabethiel Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2008 Location: Derby Vehicle: Freelander & Jeep GC 3.0 Posts: 4,416	I didn't see that coming. lol Ooops Freudian slip methinks !