tezzer
03-11-2009, 12:27
A beautiful fairy appeared one day to a destitute refugee claimant outside the Gower Street Immigration Office in Derby City Centre.
'My good man,' the fairy said, 'I've been told to grant you three wishes, since you've just arrived in the United Kingdom with your wife and seven children.'
The man told the fairy: 'Well, in Somalia where I come from we don't have good teeth, so I want new teeth, maybe some gold in them.'
The fairy looked at the man's almost toothless grin and -- PING !!! He had a brand new shining set of gold teeth in his mouth !
'What else ?' asked the fairy, 'two, more wishes' ……
The refugee claimant now got a bit bolder.
'I need a big house with a three car garage in Mickleover or Littleover with eight bedrooms for my family and the rest of my refugee relatives who still live in my country. I want to bring them all over here.'
PING ! - In the distance there could be seen a beautiful mansion with a three car garage, a long driveway, a walkout patio with a BBQ, and a sparkling inground swimming pool and a big Ford Galaxy car outside.
'One, more wish, left for you', said the fairy waving her wand. I want to be Citizen of Britain with western clothes instead of rags, with a baseball cap instead of this shawl I and I want to have white skin like the Englishmen.'
PING ! - The man was transformed, wearing worn out jeans from Matalan, a dirty Primart T-shirt and a tatty Nottingham Forest football hat. He had his bad teeth back and the mansion had disappeared from the horizon. 'What happened to my new teeth ?' he wailed. 'Where is my new house ? Wheres my Virgin Gold Card ?'
The fairy said 'Tough luck matey. Now that you are British, you're entitled to sweet F***- all, like the rest of us. And she disappeared !!......
'My good man,' the fairy said, 'I've been told to grant you three wishes, since you've just arrived in the United Kingdom with your wife and seven children.'
The man told the fairy: 'Well, in Somalia where I come from we don't have good teeth, so I want new teeth, maybe some gold in them.'
The fairy looked at the man's almost toothless grin and -- PING !!! He had a brand new shining set of gold teeth in his mouth !
'What else ?' asked the fairy, 'two, more wishes' ……
The refugee claimant now got a bit bolder.
'I need a big house with a three car garage in Mickleover or Littleover with eight bedrooms for my family and the rest of my refugee relatives who still live in my country. I want to bring them all over here.'
PING ! - In the distance there could be seen a beautiful mansion with a three car garage, a long driveway, a walkout patio with a BBQ, and a sparkling inground swimming pool and a big Ford Galaxy car outside.
'One, more wish, left for you', said the fairy waving her wand. I want to be Citizen of Britain with western clothes instead of rags, with a baseball cap instead of this shawl I and I want to have white skin like the Englishmen.'
PING ! - The man was transformed, wearing worn out jeans from Matalan, a dirty Primart T-shirt and a tatty Nottingham Forest football hat. He had his bad teeth back and the mansion had disappeared from the horizon. 'What happened to my new teeth ?' he wailed. 'Where is my new house ? Wheres my Virgin Gold Card ?'
The fairy said 'Tough luck matey. Now that you are British, you're entitled to sweet F***- all, like the rest of us. And she disappeared !!......